Paul update - Day 75

Day 75 - Monday 26 January

Lesson 1 – Don’t speak to the Press – here endeth the lesson!

Those of you who saw last week’s Evening Express / P&J will hopefully understand why we feel a little aggrieved and why I think we should have stuck with our initial reaction to their approach and not spoken to them.

So, just for the record, Pat was originally contacted by a reporter from the Evening Express who said that they wanted to do a follow up story on how Paul was getting on; this was in response to the tragic story of the 16 year old who was killed in a car accident and it was, they said, normal practise in these circumstances to follow up on previous accidents. We agonised for a few days but eventually decided to speak to them and having done some media training in the past, I was extremely careful what I said. I basically just told them just three things:

1. Paul was making a very good recovery and we considered ourselves extremely fortunate; things could have been much worse,
   
   
2. The doctors, nurses and specialists at the ARI and Woodend and all of our friends have been absolutely brilliant and we have nothing but praise for all they have done for Paul,
   
   
3. Other teenagers should take note of what has happened to Paul, realise that they are not invincible and drive more carefully.

Basically that is all I said and the guy I spoke to took notes (presumably using a crayon), sent somebody round to take some pictures and said that this was the line his article would take. A couple of days later though he contacted me again to say that he had heard that 2 17 year olds had been charged in relation to the accident and could I confirm this, to which I replied that there was only 1 car involved and that to date I was not aware of any charges – which is true.

Nonetheless, he chose to take the line he did with the story which was not only badly written and inaccurate, but untrue. The “news” that Paul had been reported to the Procurator was not in fact news at all – the police told me that it is common practise for a report to go to the Procurator after any serious accident and is something that actually happened 2 days after Paul’s crash – about 10 weeks ago - when Paul was still in the high dependency unit and was something that I discussed with the police at the time. Quite why it is newsworthy now then is beyond me!

At the time, the policeman that I dealt with (who has in fact been brilliant throughout, very sympathetic, supportive and helpful) advised me that there was no need to worry Paul (or Pat) with this and so although I did mention it to Pat, we decided not to discuss it with Paul. Now that the halfwit reporter has chosen to splash it all over the front page of his trashy newspaper though we have obviously had to tell Paul that a report has gone to the Procurator, which is obviously causing him some concern. To date though, there have been no further developments since the report originally went in and hopefully nothing further will happen.

The policeman also told us that it is sometimes better to talk to the press because otherwise they will scour Bebo, Facebook, Blogs etc. to find things to print so it is generally better to make sure they get accurate information – hence our decision to speak to them which, as it turned out, was a complete waste of time. Quite why they sent a photographer round to Alford from Aberdeen to take some pictures of Paul is beyond me – a complete waste of time and money. Given the huge number of inaccuracies in the story, it makes you wonder how much you can believe about the other nonsense they print – my assessment is probably not a lot!

Since the reporter concerned is obviously about as sharp as a cricket bat he will probably not be aware of the distress and anguish he has caused us all. I just hope he thinks it was worth it....

Anyway, moan over – the key priority is Paul, so, how is he?

The good news is that Paul has been coming home every weekend since New Year and is still progressing well. He still gets quite tired, but his walking, talking etc. is improving daily. He has been out and about a few times over the weekends and is slowly but surely getting back to normal – the only problem he has is that he thinks he is able to do far more than he can, or more accurately than we are prepared to let him!

He recently had a follow up eye appointment regarding his double vision and this has improved by about 50% since the last appointment so, as predicted, it is gradually correcting itself. Last time we went Paul was still in a wheelchair and not fully with it so it was quite difficult to do some of the measurements, but this time he was able to do all of the tests so his actual progress can now be measured more accurately. He has another appointment in March and hopefully by then it should have fully corrected itself.

His hearing in his right ear is still slightly impaired so he has been referred to a specialist for this as well, but unfortunately there is an 18 week wait!

He also had a 24 hour heart monitor fitted recently and this showed that he had an increased heart rate on a couple of occasions during the day but that this was nothing to be unduly concerned about at this stage, so we will have to wait and see what, if anything, needs to be done.

During the week his physio, speech and occupational therapy have continued and he has even ventured out to the shops to buy some food to cook, all of which he has completed with no bother so the good news is that he is being finally discharged this Thursday – January 29^th – which will be 11 weeks and 1 day following the accident. When you think back to the first few days after the crash and all of the uncertainties that we faced, this is truly remarkable.

He will have weekly appointments for the first few weeks to continue with the various therapies but hopefully he will soon be able to go back to work and we can start to plan for the future again.

So thanks once again to everyone for their help and support throughout and I am delighted to report that this story looks like having a happy ending – quite rare in this day and age with all of the gloom and doom in the Press – mind you, a lot of what is being reported might not be true......

Paul update - Day 61

Day 61 - Monday 12 January

We collected Paul on Thursday (once his 24 hour heart monitor had been taken off; no results yet though) for his weekend at home, but were advised that he had been given an appointment at the ARI to see the neurophysiologist on Friday morning - for some time since the accident Paul has complained of a general numbness in his little finger. Curiously though, it wasn’t on his right hand which is generally weaker, but on his left and all we could think was that perhaps it was related to the fact that he had broken his finger a couple of years ago, but nonetheless we thought it should be checked out.

We therefore made our way to the ARI first thing Friday morning (after breakfast at the Bistro at Paul’s request!) and found that since the abolition of car parking charges on 1^st January, parking was even harder than it used to be. Not only that, but you can no longer drive up the road past the main ARI entrance, you have to make a big detour which effectively takes you all round the (full) car park and so I dropped Pat and Paul off to try and park somewhere. Nonetheless, we managed to report to Doctor Frankenstein at the allotted time and he then proceeded to stick pins and electrodes into Paul’s arm. I am sure that if Igor had been on duty that day and there had been a thunderstorm there would have been a kite flying overhead....!

In actual fact, the guy was brilliant and incredibly informative, telling us everything he was doing and why, and it was fascinating. Basically, first of all he stuck pins in Paul’s arm at various key points to measure the sensation, and having ascertained that there was some nerve damage he then passed electric current through various parts of the nerve (which made Paul’s arm and fingers move involuntarily) to determine the location and extent of the damage. Fortunately, the nerve (the Ulna nerve – the one that makes your fingers tingle when you bang your funny bone) has some damage but it is not severed and Paul has some sensation, which is very good news. He wasn’t able to determine exactly where the damage was, but suspected it was in Paul’s elbow. He explained that nerves re-generate at about 1mm per day so the worst case is that it could take 440 days from whenever the damage occurred to fully recover, but he suspected it would be much less than that.

It really was fascinating to watch what he could do and see the wave patterns that were generated on the computer in response to Paul’s hand movements, and from this (there were flat spots in the wave pattern) he could tell exactly what the problem was. I did ask him if his surname was Frankenstein, but he assured us it wasn’t! It certainly seems as though this numbness shouldn’t be a long term problem which is good news, and we wondered whether it happened in the accident itself or whether he did the damage when he was thrashing about when unconscious – whenever it was, it was almost certainly caused by a blow to the elbow.

We eventually decided that we would speak to the Evening Express – time will tell if it was a wise decision - and so they sent a photographer round on Friday afternoon to take some pictures of Paul. They also wanted some of him as a toddler, at school and also before the accident as well as some of the car. I emphasised that we thought ourselves extremely fortunate that Paul had survived and was making such a good recovery, that we had all had fantastic support from our friends, that the doctors, nurses and therapists at both the ARI and Maidencraig had been absolutely superb and that all young drivers should take it as a lesson that they are not invincible – whether this is the line they take in the story will be interesting to see. It was supposed to be in today’s Evening Express, but today’s headline was that 2 more young drivers had been killed in separate accidents which presumably meant that Paul’s story was not appropriate and they will keep it for another day.

That’s three young people killed in the North East this year already, and it is only the 12^th January......

Anyway, after his photo shoot Paul went to Holly’s to say goodbye to some of his friends who were going back to Uni. We also went for a drink with Alison and Tony and had a great time chatting. Saturday was relatively quiet, we just nipped into the village during the day and took Paul to the Bistro for dinner, and when we got home we lit the fire and watched the latest Indiana Jones film.

We all managed to get a bit of a lie in on Sunday, and in the afternoon Paul went to the cinema with Eilidh - he thoroughly enjoyed getting out without the old farts in tow! They got back about 1730, we had dinner and then it was time to bring him back to Maidencraig again!

He is continuing to have physio, occupational and speech therapy but all the indications are that he will now be allowed home every weekend and will become more and more independent, and the hope is still that he will be discharged at the end of January. Paul is starting to talk about the future and what he wants to do, which is very encouraging.

As I think I mentioned before, there is a case conference scheduled for 19^th January when we should find out exactly where we are.

He is now starting to argue with us as well, so he is definitely on the mend!

Paul update - Day 56

Day 56 - Wednesday 7 January

Now that Paul is back at Maidencraig, our lives have reverted back to the pre-Christmas ‘normality’. Paul continues to have physio, occupational and speech therapy and all of his therapists have commented on how well he is progressing; there are small but positive improvements every day. They have put a 24 hour ECG halter monitor on him today to check his heart following the previous scare; fortunately there have been no repeats but this monitor will tell them how his heart is now and presumably whether any follow up is required.

We continue to thank our lucky stars about how well he is doing and every now and then something gives us a stark reminder of what might have been. One example of this is the tragic headline in yesterday’s Evening Express about a 16 year old lad that had been killed in a car accident; the driver was 17. The editorial in the paper suggested that all parents should sit down with their teenage children and impress on them how precious life is and how easily it can be taken away...

The Evening Express actually phoned us this morning to see how Paul was doing; evidently when there is another serious accident they follow up on previous accidents so we are currently trying to decide whether we should speak to them. If it helps prevent others going through what we have all been through, or worse, then it will be worth doing.

Anyway, on a far brighter note, they have now stopped all of Paul’s medication and so the likelihood of him being discharged at the end of January is growing by the day. As a first step, following the success of his visits home over Christmas and New Year, he is coming home again this weekend and we are collecting him tomorrow –Thursday 8 January and returning him on Sunday evening so if you want to visit him, please don’t come to Maidencraig but you are welcome to visit at home. As before though, please ring first to make sure we are in.

They are planning some trips into town with Paul over the next couple of weeks to see how he copes with traffic, crossing the road, getting on and off buses etc., and once that has been assessed, presumably we can start to take him further afield.

So, just to re-cap – Paul will be at home this weekend, back in Maidencraig during the week and the assumption is that this will continue until his final discharge, after which we can start to think about the future once again!

Oh yes, and we persuaded him to shave yesterday so he no longer looks like a wookie!

Paul update - Day 50

Day 50 - Thursday 1 January 2009

Another very quiet day today.

Many thanks to Charles, Laura and Katharine for a fabulous time last night; seeing Paul on the settee chatting and generally larking about with his chums on New Years eve was something we have dreamed about since November. He was keen to stop the night there with the others but we didn't think that wise, so it took us quite a while to persuade him it was time to leave! As a result, by the time we picked Mark up, we didn't get home until around 2 o'clock so we all slept in this morning! Andrew popped round this afternoon and after an early dinner Paul and Pat had a nap this evening so we are now sitting watching television with Paul gradually working his way through the contents of the fridge; just like old times!

It is likely that the rate of Paul's recovery will start to slow down a little now and so I will probably stop doing a daily update unless anything significant happens. I will try and do an update every 4 or 5 days to start with and see how we get on, but if anyone else wants to post or comment please do.

Finally Guy, you were right about Paul Kossoff - what would we do without Wikipedia!

Paul update - Day 49

Day 49 - Wednesday 31 December

So, we made it to the last day of 2008, a year we won't be sorry to see the back of!

Paul was due to have occupational therapy this morning so we went to Tescos on the way in and arrived around the time his session should have been ending, only to find that the OT lady was off sick so he could have come home earlier! Nonetheless, we picked him up and came home via Eilidh's as he wanted to see Henry (the dog!). We gave Anna a call as well as he wanted to see the puppies but unfortunately nobody was in, so perhaps we can do that over the weekend.

We also popped in to see our GP as he was keen to see Paul; he very kindly came to the ARI to see Paul a couple of days after the accident so he was very pleased to see how far he has come on since then, and he had a long chat with Paul.

Paul is having a nap at the moment in preparation for tonight, so we hope to see some of you later. For those we don't see, best wishes for a happy 2009.

Paul update - Day 48

Day 48 - Tuesday 30 December

Paul only had physio today and had a joint session with Kevin. One of the exercises he did is designed to strengthen his back and stomach muscles and involves a large ball (he described it as being like a space hopper without the horns the other day); apparently he lay on his back on the ball and uses his legs to roll it forwards and backwards – sounds complicated to me! They also used parallel bars to improve balance and strength. He is also now allowed to walk further without support and now only needs somebody nearby just in case!

Andrew visited early afternoon and Laura flew in from Florida today, so Holly picked her up from the Airport and brought her straight to Maidencraig. It is about 4 weeks since Laura last saw Paul – he had just regained consciousness last time she saw him – so she was very pleased to see his progress for herself. Stuart also visited so Pat and I left them to it for a while until supper time when Stuart had to leave, after which we played a few games of Uno and watched television.

Paul only has OT planned for the morning – (he still hasn’t done his homework!)- so we can pick him up around 1100 to bring him home. He wants to go and see Anna’s puppies and Eilidh’s dog Henry, so we will probably do that on the way home if we can and then Paul can have a rest before we go to Katharine’s to see in the New Year. He doesn’t have to be back at Maidencraig until Sunday again, so if any of you want to visit we would love to see you, but as mentioned yesterday please give us a buzz first to make sure we are in.

In case I don’t manage to post tomorrow, best wishes to you all for a Happy 2009 and thanks again for all you help and support.

Paul update - Day 47

Day 47 - Monday 29 December

Unfortunately, life has temporarily reverted back to what has been “normal” for the past few weeks. Just the two of us at home in the morning (although Mark is at home at the moment, but he is working at the garage so leaves early), get up, something to eat and then off to Maidencraig.

Paul had physio this morning and he walked all the way to the gym in the main hospital with no support which is a fair distance. During physio he did more exercises on a thing which he says is a bit like a space hopper (for those old enough to remember!) to improve his balance and also more exercises on the steps designed to strengthen his hip. It won’t be long before he doesn’t need the wheelchair so this is another major step forward.

Pat also noted that Paul wasn’t squinting nearly as much as he did before so we asked him about his double vision and he said it had improved a lot; he first noticed the improvement this morning when he played the X-Box and thought how much better he could see what he was doing.

He still hasn’t done his homework though (hmmm, that rings a vague bell for some reason...); he was given some writing exercises to do over Christmas but didn’t get round to doing them so we keep nagging him to do it (hmmm, that rings a vague bell for some reason...) so it seems as though some things haven’t changed!! He says he will do them over the New Year... Stuart – do you want to win your fiver back, I feel a wager coming on!?

When we were in the WRVS having the now traditional cup of tea some near neighbours of ours (The Gillans) came in and said hello to Paul, apparently Mrs Gillans’ Dad is in Woodend and they were visiting him.

Paul has been moaning about us fussing over him, especially when we make sure that he doesn’t walk anywhere without one of us going with him but today he got a stark reminder of why we do it. A chap got up from a nearby table in the WRVS this afternoon and we are not sure what happened but we think he slipped and went down like a sack of spuds, banging his head on the floor quite hard. Luckily there were doctors present who were with him in seconds but after that Paul said it made him realise what could happen – whether it stops him moaning or not though only time will tell!!

It was confirmed today that he can come home for New Year and as far as we know we will be picking him up Wednesday and dropping him back Sunday, so please don’t come to visit him at Maidencraig as he won’t be there! You are welcome to visit at home though, but just give us a quick buzz to make sure we are in – we aren’t planning to go far but we may pop into the village. So we hope to see some of you over the next few days.